jean michel

Thanks to my mother, I never had to deal with any of those doubts and emotional repercussions. The “supposed burden” of the consequences of that phone call and the events that were set in motion, I was still carrying and they suddenly evaporated into thin air. My mother called the police, March 10, 1977, within minutes of my admitting to her that Roman had sex with me. She never even asked a second question, just “Did he do it?” That was all she needed to know. She didn’t call the police for herself and she didn’t do it because she was angry or vengeful. She did it for me. To show me that I had value and that I should not let myself be abused or mistreated and she certainly would not. By example, she was showing me my worth, teaching me to be strong and stand up against what is wrong. That we as a family, would not tolerate this. And even more importantly something else, that I was not required to be damaged by his actions, I was allowed to be okay. I didn’t have to behave like a victim, but he would face the consequences. That seemed like a contradiction at the time, now I realize it was a gift.

and I certainly mean no disrespect to those who may still be struggling, maybe just offer a little hope.

I look back now knowing that my mother was protecting me from the potential of ending up with all that regret and bitterness. I realize she never once told me I was damaged. She accepted it when I said I was okay, she took me at my word, but she called the police anyway. Now that contradiction makes so much sense. I am so grateful that her anger towards him didn’t manifest in her need for me to be damaged by him. The proceedings were difficult and I was emotionally devastated during that year, but she took the blame for it. She never apologized for any of it, somehow she knew that she was standing up for me and whatever the consequences, it was the right thing.

#polanski #justice #viol