That one tweet… | Christian Heilmann
▻https://www.christianheilmann.com/2015/05/30/that-one-tweet
And that’s when my anger turned inward and the ugly voice of impostor syndrome reared its head. Here is what it told me:
You’re a fool. You’re making a clown of yourself trying to explain something everyone knows and nobody gives a shit about. This battle is lost.
You’re trying to cover up your loss of reality of what’s needed nowadays to be a kick-ass developer by releasing a lot of talks nobody needs. Why do you care about writing a new talk every time? Just do one, keep delivering it and do some real work instead
Everybody else moved on, you just don’t want to admit to yourself that you lost track.
They are correct in mocking you. You are a hypocrite for preaching things and then violating them by not using HTML for a format of publication it wasn’t intended for.
I felt devastated, I doubted everything I did. When I delivered the talk I had so looked forward to and many people thanked me for my insights I felt even worse:
Am I just playing a role?
Am I making the lives of those who want to follow what I advocate unnecessarily hard?
Shouldn’t they just build things that work in Chrome now and burn them in a month and replace them with the next new thing?
Syndrome de l’#imposteur via @kReEsTaL ▻https://twitter.com/kReEsTaL/status/651698691796041728